


Why Do You Feel So Down

by HavocRoyale



Series: We're All Stars REDUX [3]
Category: Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: F/F, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, Minor Violence, trans damian hubbard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:54:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24097639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HavocRoyale/pseuds/HavocRoyale
Summary: When Janis and Cady climb into the truck, Janis puts the key into the ignition but doesn’t turn it. Instead she just sits there. All she can think about is how CadyknewRegina was going to be at her truck, Cady planned that. Cady probably alsoplannedthe bathroom apology. Said friend reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder and Janis can’t help but jerk away. Cady was being selfish, she was rushing this becauseshewanted Janis and Regina to be okay soshecould hang out with both of them and not feel bad.“Jan, are you okay?”Janis pulled out her phone and earbuds, she didn’t want to yell at Cady, she didn’t want to blow up. She wanted to be able to talk about this and she can’t talk about it if Cady asks now because it’s all fresh and she’s not going to be thinking clearly, “I’m fine.”
Relationships: Cady Heron/Shane Oman (one-sided), Damian Hubbard & Janis Sarkisian, Janis Sarkisian & Shane Oman
Series: We're All Stars REDUX [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1738498
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> tbh I loved rewriting the parts that were cadnis into janis & damian stuff like,,,hmm i missed that friendship I didn't implement it enough before imo
> 
> also obvs this is the Do It Yourself (Or Don't) rewrite  
>  **tw: the d slur is used once and there's a mention of a past suicide attempt**

For once, Janis has never been happier that Cady had to help Norbury before school. That means she didn’t have to drive her to school and it gives her time to gather her thoughts before Cady shows up at the table before classes.

She passes Aaron by the bike racks as she enters the main building. He waves and smiles at her before going back to talking to...whoever that was sitting on the bench. Probably an old soccer buddy or maybe a drug dealer, they _were_ in a huge black and white jacket with a large pair of sunglasses obscuring their face. They didn’t look none too happy Aaron acknowledged her passing either.

_Maybe Aaron was engaging in steroid culture. It’s not like the school could stop him anymore, he’s not a student._

The thought made her laugh, as if Aaron Samuels would ever engage in _any_ drug culture. When she entered the cafeteria, she noticed immediately that something was off, and as she approached the so-called Art Freaks table, she realized what.

Damian wasn’t there.

Which, for one, bummer. Who else is she going to vent to before Cady shows up and ruins her chances? And, for two, thank god. Because Janis knows he wouldn’t have anything to say that would actually make her feel better today. She shoots him a quick text to make sure he wasn’t dying or something.

When he says he’s doing “trans gay things” she feels anxiety bubble up in the back of her mind. Typically, if he was trying to avoid telling her what was wrong and deflecting it, it could only be one of two things: it’s that time of the month and his dysphoria is at an all time high or some jackass pushed him around when she wasn’t there. She knows it isn’t his period because she knows his cycle but she asks anyways. 

Janis was right, meaning it had to be option two.

She didn’t wait for his response before standing up from the table and looking around. In no time, she spotted her target.

_Shane Oman._

He was big, a little dim, and most importantly, intimidating. He also doubled as their emergency bodyguard, no one worked better at keeping assholes off their backs than the Northshore lion himself. Janis was incredibly grateful that he was as friendly as he was, she didn’t want to think about what it’d be like to be on the receiving end of his strength. He was sitting at a table that was otherwise unoccupied aside from one of the mathletes, the blond one, and clearly trying to finish his work that he failed to last night.

_He’ll have plenty of time to work and study from detention._

Janis walked up to the two of them, heavily dropping her bag onto the table to get their attention. The mathlete looked peeved she was interrupting but it’s not like he’d say anything about it, he’s the quiet one.

“Oman. I need a favor.”

Shane gave her a dopey grin, “What’s up, Sarks?”

“Kurt Kelly and his gaggle of idiots are harassing Damian again, think you could teach them a lesson?”

“How big of a lesson we talkin’?”

“You take it as far as you want, big guy. I just don’t want them breathing down Dam’s neck with finals and everything going on.” 

“I’ve been waiting for an excuse to pick a fight with Kurt,” Shane leaned back and cracked his knuckles, “Fucker’s had it comin’ for a few years now. This being his senior year, it could be my last chance.”

“So you’ll do it?” She could see the mathlete squirm out the corner of her eye, he mustn’t be very comfortable with all the talk of “teaching lessons” she should finish this up quick.

“You already know I will.”

Shane shot her another smile before standing and packing everything on the table up. The mathlete tried to stop him, “Shane, we have a calc final today!”

“Chill, Ty. It’ll be fine, I’ll have plenty of time to study in detention!”

Janis couldn’t help a laugh as she wandered back to her own table, texting Damian in the process. 

Turns out she didn’t need to ask Shane to do anything at all, no one had harassed Damian. He made her promise to apologize next time she saw the mascot, she agreed but she has a feeling Shane didn’t mind any and she knows he was right when he said Kurt had it coming. When she got to her table, Cady was already sitting there, silently going over her own notes for her calculus final. It was a stark reminder that 2/3rds of the Plastics would be sitting there with her doing the same thing later at lunch.

And if Cady got her way, all three of them would be there. Not just the cronies.

The redhead gave her a bright smile as she sat down next to her. Cady slid down the bench until she was flush against Janis’ side, leaning her head on her shoulder as she continued to cycle through her notes. Janis rolled her eyes at the texts from Damian.

_She’s never living the “Regina George Dilemma” down._

* * *

Janis asks the teacher if she can go to the bathroom the second she puts her bag down and the bell rings in French. It’s a habit she formed in middle school, if she goes during the very start of a class, then they’ll be at their emptiest. No other students there to push her around or call her names or lock her out of the bathroom.

She’s washing her hands when she hears the door open and the familiar click of heels enter. She freezes up involuntarily, her shoulders hunch and somewhere in her head she knows she’s preparing for a fight of sorts.

_Regina isn’t like that anymore._

She could see the pink shirt and the blonde hair and the fucking _spinal halo_ in the mirrors in front of her. Janis refused to turn around even after Regina cleared her throat.

“What do you want?” She snarled.

“To apologize?”

_Oh, of course. Of course she’s going to “apologize” when they’re alone in the bathrooms and Janis can’t just walk away without making it glaringly obvious that she isn’t ready for this conversation yet. She might never be ready for this._

Janis scoffed and finally turned around, crossing her arms across her chest, “Well? I’m waiting.”

“God, do you have to make this so difficult? I’m trying to be nice.”

“That’s a first.”

“Look, Janis, I am sorry for outing you in middle school. And I’m sorry for not apologizing before I, like literally, died, and I guess I’m sorry for everyone else being dicks to you as well,” Regina was looking at the floor, avoiding eye contact, avoiding as much confrontation as she could.

“You _guess?_ ”

All Janis could feel was anger, white hot burning anger bubbling up in her chest. She uncrossed her arms, instead balling her fists at her sides.

“You _guess_ you’re sorry for ruining my life? You _guess_ you’re sorry for starting all that crap and calling me a lesbian in front of the whole school before I was even sure it was true _and keying “space dyke” into my locker?_ You _guess_ you’re fucking sorry?” She felt herself taking steps closer and closer to Regina, she didn’t however notice Regina backing up slowly until her back hit the stalls, “You _guess_ you’re sorry? I almost-”

Janis bit her tongue so hard she tasted copper. _Did she really want to tell Regina?_ Yes. She wanted it to hurt, she wants _this_ to hurt, she wants Regina to feel every little bit of pain and bullshit and everything she felt in eighth grade.

“I almost _killed_ myself because of you.”

Regina gasped and their eyes finally met, her grey eyes were wide. Janis thinks that she sees regret or sadness in them, she shrugs that off because it’s more likely just fear. She storms off to the door rather than say anymore. She also thinks she hears a soft “I’m sorry” behind her before the door slams shut.

She goes to the art room instead of her french class. It’s second period meaning Mr.Pat is in a meeting and not teaching a class, making the art room completely void of life aside from Janis. She pulled out her unfinished painting from the canvas rack and set it up on an easel, she would not be going back to french. She’ll get her bag after the period ends.

Janis dragged a stool over to the easel, taking a seat and just staring at the mostly blank canvas. She would either get a lot done in the next hour and a half, or very little.

...But first she needed to text Cady about Regina’s “apology.”

* * *

Regina still ended up sitting with them at lunch.

Seating went like this: Janis all the way on the end, with Cady on her left , then Karen, then Gretchen. Damian was across from her with Aaron on his right and Regina on the other side of Aaron. There was as much space between her and Regina as there possibly could be and Janis _still_ hated it. She kept her head down, stabbing at her food rather than eating it. Damian sat forward on his seat so he could reach under the table and hold her hand. It was a small comfort for a much larger sinking feeling in her gut.

Janis knows Regina probably really is trying no matter how shit she is at apologizing. She squeezes Damian’s hand as hard as she can and he squeezes back. She wishes she could just go eat in the art room without everyone knowing _why_ she wasn’t at lunch. Damian shoots her a sympathetic look, he’d probably cover for her if she left now.

She could also see Regina in her peripheral. She was rigid, stiff, nervous, and every now and then she’d look up at Janis. Like she was waiting for something. An explosion probably.

_Or maybe an apology...As if._

Lunch ends and Janis can’t get up fast enough. Her next class has no one from lunch in it and she’s plenty okay with that.

* * *

By the time the bell rings for dismissal, Janis hasn’t forgotten about Regina’s botched apology but she has forgiven Cady for her part in it. She really can’t stay mad at her anymore. They’re walking to her truck hand-in-hand like they do _every_ day. Cady seems a little nervous but Janis shakes it off assuming she’s just fretting over finals like she does.

Janis realizes she’s nervous for a completely different reason when she gets an eyeful of bright pink and white against her battered old black truck.

Because of course Regina isn’t done ruining her day yet.

Out of pure instinct alone, she tries to clench her hands into fists. Cady doesn’t react at all when Janis squeezes her hand so hard she _knows_ it probably hurt her. The thought of hurting Cady gets her to relax some, untense every muscle in her body and loosen her grip on Cady’s hand. _She was not going to let go though._

Regina apologizes. 

Again.

It’s better than the first time, it sounds and feels and looks more genuine, and she apologizes for “trapping her into the bathroom.” She bids her farewell to Cady and makes her way out of the parking lot, apparently her mom was waiting for her in the front parking lot.

When Janis and Cady climb into the truck, Janis puts the key into the ignition but doesn’t turn it. Instead she just sits there. All she can think about is how Cady _knew_ Regina was going to be at her truck, Cady _planned_ that. Cady probably also planned the bathroom apology. Said friend reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder and Janis can’t help but jerk away. Cady was being selfish, she was rushing this because _she_ wanted Janis and Regina to be okay so _she_ could hang out with both of them and not feel bad.

“Jan, are you okay?”

Janis pulled out her phone and earbuds, she didn’t want to yell at Cady, she didn’t want to blow up. She wanted to be able to talk about this and she can’t talk about it if Cady asks now because it’s all fresh and she’s not going to be thinking clearly, “I’m fine.”

She plays her music at full blast and tries not to think about Cady or Regina or _any_ emotions. She focuses on the music.

Once she gets home after dropping Cady off at her house, the first thing she does before she even gets out of her truck is leave their group chat. Maybe there’s a better joke about the timing than “blaze it” but Janis can’t think of one. Cady immediately tries to direct message her afterwards and Janis let’s herself say her piece and blocks Cady before she gets too carried away. She wouldn’t fuck this up. She wouldn’t let herself do that again.

Damian tries to talk sense into her. She mutes him for almost an hour, she spends the time painting and laying on the couch with her cats. Well one of her cats, Van doesn’t like naps but Picasso is eager to lay on her stomach for a quick nap. Eventually she wakes up and she feels better, calmer and more put together, she checks her phone and notices that Damian offered to help her study while she can’t study with Cady. She quickly responds before pulling her shoes back on and walking to his house.

It takes her something like 30 minutes to walk to his house but the fresh air and exercise helps her stay calm and focused. In the end, they don’t do much studying. They watch movies and gossip, Damian makes sure she knows how ridiculous Shane and Kurt’s fight was and how important it was she apologize to Shane tomorrow.

She falls asleep eventually laying on the floor against Gracie, an old leonberger that Damian has had for as long as she’s known him, while Fiyero, another of Damian’s dogs lays across her lap. Janis is absolutely not ready for tomorrow but there’s no escaping it and she’d much rather focus on the dogs sleeping around her than even think about having to face Cady or Regina at school.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one gets a little more serious so... **tw: a little more in depth about Janis' suicide attempt & the bullying that led up to her attempted suicide**

Janis was rudely awoken by her head hitting the head floor of Damian’s bedroom after Gracie got up from under her and lumbered out of the room.

“Sorry, I thought you were already up, honey,” Damian’s mom was standing in the doorway, “Damian’s in the shower, there’s some leftovers in the fridge if you want to take some for lunch. I’ve got to get going, but make sure you two let the dogs into the backyard before you leave for school.”

Her head was ringing, “Yeah, okay. Thank you, Ms.Hubbard.”

She thinks maybe Ms.Hubbard said something in response but she didn’t catch it. She stood up and grabbed her jeans from her bag and pulled them back on, she’ll have to borrow one of Damian’s shirts if she goes to school today.

_If._

Just the thought of going to school made her nauseous. She was definitely not going today, fuck her trig final, _she was not going to school._ But Damian was right last night, she needed to talk to Cady. She made her way into the kitchen, pulling out the tupperware of spaghetti from the fridge and making herself a plate. Nothing like a plate of cold leftovers for breakfast to start the day!

She sat down at the island to watch TV from the kitchen, it was just the weather forecast for the day. There was a fairshare of Star Wars jokes and references peppered in, Janis almost can’t believe she forgot about May the 4th. She could use that as an excuse to hang out with Cady outside of school. Well, okay, she didn’t need an excuse to do that. Cady would probably let her climb through her window at 1am if she asked to without even questioning it.

She was pulled from her thoughts when Fiyero let out a long whine, pawing at her from his place on the floor.

“Aw, do you want a meatball, buddy?” Janis plucked a meatball off her plate and dropped it to the floor for the dog, “Don’t tell Damian.”

“Don’t tell me what?” Damian walked in, towel draped over his shoulders, and phone in hand, “Wait, let me guess, you totally unblocked Caddy in the middle of the night and told her your true feelings and she’s like totally in love with you too and dumped Aaron to be with you?”

Janis mustered up all of her sarcasm possible, “O-M-G! Like totally! How’d you know?!”

“You’re laying it on a bit thick there,” Damian made his rounds through the kitchen: filled the dog bowls, made his own coffee, and grabbed a bowl and some cereal.

“That’s because I haven’t unblocked Cady, I don’t have a crush on her, and she’s not dumping Aaron anytime soon.”

“You can keep telling yourself that, hun.”

“Woop-de-doo, thanks for granting me permission to not have a crush on a girl I don’t have a crush on,” She hopped off the stool and set her dishes into the dishwasher, “Anyways, I don’t think I’m gonna be at school today.”

“Oh?”

“I don’t have the energy to face Caddy _and_ Regina _and_ be around the entirety of the student body of Northshore. But I think I’m gonna ask Caddy to ditch with me so I can at least talk to her.”

“Ooooh, gonna-”

“I swear to god, Damian, don’t you even think about finishing that sentence.”

He had a sly grin across his face, “Okay, well...you better ask her fast before she gets on the bus to school- _or worse!_ Calls _Regina_ for a ride!”

Janis shoved him as she pulled her phone out, “Shut the fuck up.”

* * *

Much to Janis’ disappointment, Cady had agreed to help Karen study at lunch again, meaning she’d have to cut out part of their time together to go _back_ to Northshore for lunch. But Janis can’t really complain, Cady was just trying to be a good friend, what does it matter if it’s one of Regina’s henchmen?

Okay, so maybe she still complains a little, but it’s not much and Cady laughs it off anyways. 

“So, do you actually have a place you wanna go for breakfast or…?”

Cady looked sheepish, “Well...I really want like some flapjacks and Damian says-”

“Nope! Damian’s wrong! I know what he says and he’s wrong! You want pancakes? We’re going into town and going to Wildberry’s. It’s still a little earlier so hopefully there won’t be a crowd or nothin’.”

“Oh. Janis, if there’s going to be a lot of people, we don’t-”

“Wildberry’s is worth it, Caddy. They have the best blueberry syrup and if we aren’t going to make our own breakfast, then we’re going there.”

“Aye aye, Captain,” Cady dramatically rolled her eyes but Janis could see her bright smile out of the corner of her eye.

“What!?” Cady leapt to her feet on the couch, effectively dumping the bowl of popcorn in her lap all over Janis, “Dark Vader’s Luke’s dad?!”

“It’s _Darth_ Vader and yeah, you didn’t know that?”

Cady looked down at Janis with an incredulous look, refusing to sit back down even after Janis paused the movie, “Uh? No?!”

“Oh man, I really thought the pop culture would have reached you by now. I can’t wait to watch Harry Potter with you,” Janis snickered as she began to try and pick up all the popcorn.

Cady dropped back down, making popcorn go everywhere again, “Oh! I’ve actually read the books already. Didn’t have TV but we had _tons_ of books in Kenya.”

Go figure, of course Cady _read_ Harry Potter, who hasn’t? Well...aside from Janis, herself.

An awkward silence fell between them. They still needed to talk about yesterday and Regina and the apology. In all honesty, Janis would be totally okay with just ignoring it and pretending it never happened and pretending that everything was okay again. But Cady wouldn’t be able to and she knows even if Cady _could_ , they really shouldn’t, this is too important for them to ignore. What if they didn’t talk about it ever and then they ran into the same problem? What if Cady had an ex or someone that it ended badly with from Africa just show up one day? What if-

_Wait. No. That’s weird, that makes it sound like she and Regina were exes at some point. Ex-friends, yes. Ex-girlfriends? Absolutely not. Well, maybe- No. No, no, no. Nope! Not entertaining that further._

Janis cut herself off quick and blunt, “We still need to talk about Regina.”

“Right, yeah,” Cady looked embarrassed, “I really really am sorry for getting involved, Janis. I know it wasn’t really my place to get involved but like you guys used to be like super good friends and Regina felt bad about it even _before_ the revenge party and the bus and and she wanted to fix it and I just- I didn’t think about how you would feel or what you went through really.”

“And also like that’s like all I could think about last night, I actually ended up like falling asleep on the phone with Regina because like, well, I was going to call Aaron but he’s been super slumped with college stuff and Damian was, without question, with you, and I just didn’t know who else I could really talk to about it and-”

Cady was gesturing her arms wildly as she talked, Janis grabbed her hands and pulled them down to get Cady’s attention, “Caddy, it’s fine. It’s okay.”

“I-I just...are you sure?” Cady squirmed and Janis could see the anxiety in her eyes, “Yes, I’m sure. You wouldn’t be sitting in my basement watching Star Wars with me and spilling popcorn all over me if it wasn’t.”

A deep breath, “I’m really glad that like you know what went wrong and I know I can trust you not to do that again. I’m sorry for kinda pushing you away and I’m sorry for kind of blowing up and not really talking to you about like why and all and just...You deserve to know the story, like _everything_.”

Cady just nodded, blue eyes big and curious. She didn’t say anything, just held Janis’ hands a little tighter.

“Okay so like, duh, I got bullied pretty bad after the whole “I’m a space alien with four butts” thing and like it wasn’t really physical or too serious for a while after the first few days because I had a lot of classes with Shane and he made sure people knew that if they fucked with me then they fucked with him. But eventually yknow he was like _always_ in ISSP and the assholes started getting brave again and it was just like pushes and shoves and trips mostly. But that stuff stacks up, and like Damian said it got so bad I got pulled from school and homeschooled and just…”

She was crying, she could feel the tears trail down her cheeks and she hated it. She hated telling people about it, it didn’t make her weak but it made her _feel_ weak. The only people who know are her dad, Lena, Damian, and Shane for a reason. Well, and Regina as well now.

“Jan, are you okay?” One of Cady’s hands cupped her cheek as she used her thumb to wipe away some of Janis’ tears, “You don’t have to tell me, you know…”

“No. No I want to just- It’s hard no matter what, only like five people know. I started taking the long ways to classes, using walkways outside and stuff instead of indoors to avoid people. And one day some jackasses figured it out and they shoved me to the ground and everytime I tried standing or getting up they just...they just kicked or pushed me back down and they were laughing and calling me every insult in the book,” The more she talked the easier it got but Janis could feel the anger and despair bubbling up in the back of her mind, “It was actually Shane who stopped them, sort of. He had a teacher with him. It’s almost like he just _knew_ something bad was the reason I didn’t make it to class.”

She laughed at that piece, she remembered Shane trying to get involved despite the teacher’s attempts to stop him. He got a black eye and an out of school suspension out of it, he liked to embellish it and say he took on all five guys by himself and won. But in reality he took on two out of three guys and had the teacher not stepped in when she did, he definitely would have lost.

“I got to go home, my dad came pick me up during his lunch break and he offered to take the rest of the day off for me and- I was an idiot, I told him to go back to work. If-If Shane hadn’t gotten an out of school for punching one of the guys who had been kicking me around...He basically let himself into my house after his sister brought him home and left him. And if Shane never showed up then needless to say, I would likely be _dead_ right now. I took like a ton of pills and shit and I was just so tired and sick of it and- He called the ambulance and waited with me. He said he tried to ride in the ambulance with me and go to the hospital but they wouldn’t let him because he was too young or something. He did show up at the hospital with his mom and my dad and a stuffed bear though.”

Janis was quickly enveloped in a tight hug, “Janis, I’m so sorry. I know like that probably totally doesn’t mean much but I mean it and-”

“Caddy, it’s fine. Thank you...I blamed Regina for a lot of that and like in a way she did cause it but it’s also not really her fault that some assholes jumped me,” Janis paused, unsure of what to tack onto that really, “I...you said she felt bad before the bus right? It’s not much but that’s a start to me. I kind of thought she only felt bad after dying and maybe that was shitty of me to kind of like invalidate her remorse or whatever but, knowing she felt bad beforehand _might_ make it easier to forgive her. But I said _might_ so don’t hold me to that.”

She could feel Cady smile into her shoulder, “I’m glad you told me about that though, Janis. Also! I totally had no clue that you and Shane were so close? Like obviously your friends, I tutor both of you, but I didn’t know it went back like that.”

Cady pulled away to look at her with an amused look, Janis smiled back, “Well, we’re not really as close now. But yeah we used to be really close, he was my beard once when my dad’s family complained about me not having a boyfriend one year. He took me to a school dance and we took pictures and everything. He’s pretty cool.”

Cady hugged her again. Janis noticed she must’ve also been crying some. The anxiety in her gut was replaced with a warm fuzzy feeling. Janis smiled big and held Cady close. Having Damian and even Shane in the rare occasions they hung out was nice, but having Cady around was something special. For one she didn’t really have any girl friends since 8th grade, not in person at least, she’d befriended a few people online. And for two, of course it was different from Damian or anyone else because whether Janis liked it or not she was softer around Cady and it was a small comfort to know she could still be like that around people who _aren’t_ Damian.

“By the way, we have one movie after this and then we have to watch something else. We’ve gotta save the prequels for Damian, they’re his favorite.”

Cady gasped, leaping away from Janis like she’d been burned, “No! I thought we were gonna watch them all today!”

“Nah, it’s a house rule! No prequels without Damian, he’d be utterly devastated if we watched them by ourselves,” Picasso meowed and dashed out from the hallway, leaping into her lap.

Maybe he missed the tears and memories, but he was here now and that was enough for Janis. And enough to draw Cady’s attention away from the mess that is the Star Wars prequels. Janis laughed to herself, Damian was going to kill her for telling Cady they were his favorites.

Janis stayed true to her word. She drove Cady to Northshore for lunch and stayed in her truck while she waited. She intended to take a nap, her seat dropped all the way back. She should’ve brought Picasso, she had a feeling her anxiety might spike while she waited like this. 

Her heart leapt into her through and she jumped up into a sitting position at a knock on her window. She expected it to be a teacher, but instead it was none other than Shane Oman. He shot her a dopey grin and waved at her. Janis rolled the window down and he folded his arms on the new opening in the door, resting his head on his hands, “You feelin’ okay, Sarkisian?”

“Yeah. Wasn’t really _feeling_ school today, yknow? I’m just here with Cady so she could tutor Karen Smith and then I’ll be long gone again for the day.”

“Lucky you. Get to spend the whole day with Cadster without studying.”

“You know, you can do that too sometimes, right? She like adores you, dude. You don’t have to avoid her outside of tutoring just because she’s dating Aaron.”

Shane avoided looking at her, ducking his head down and looking at his feet, Janis can hear him kicking the rocks around, “I dunno, Sarks. It’s not- I can’t. She’s not like Regina, I can’t just-.”

She knows what he’s thinking. For such a big optimistic guy, he gets lost in his head a lot. Regina tore him down, just as she’d tore Janis down. She decides to change the topic, “So, what are you doing out here? Shouldn’t you be in detention right now, big guy?”

He laughed, it was deep and hearty, and smiled big as he could, “Nah! I only struck back in “self-defense” and I only got one hit in before we got shut down. The guy’s a pussy, he said we’d fight out here today to “finish it” but clearly he didn’t show up.”

“Figures,” Janis pretends not to notice the glassy look in his eyes. It’s not her place to intervene.

“Yeah, well, if he’s not showin’ I better get back to Ty. He’ll have a conniption if I skip out on another study session during finals,” He pushed off the truck, making it rock a little as he stood back up, “He likes to double check everything I do with Cady on top of the work I do with him.”

“See ya’ later, Oman,” Janis almost forgot her promise to Damian, she leaned out the window to shout at Shane as he walked away, “And I’m sorry for getting you detention!”

“Always worth it, Janis! Always worth it!”

**Author's Note:**

> yes I renamed one of Janis' cats Van Gogh, he's an orange tabby with a clipped ear....and like last time Picasso is still a tortiseshell bobtail cat and her service animal


End file.
